Naa peru Pavan, madhi Vizag nenu chinnapatnundi chala introvert ni ewaritho ekkuva kalise vadini kaadu, so friends evaru leru eppudu intlone unde vadini. Alanti time lo kotha ga maa street lo internet cafe okati open chesaru, dantho pattu playstation and games kuda 1hour ki ala rent ki tesukoni aadukovochu. Naku games ante interest undatam valla nenu internet cafe lo chala time spend cheyyadam modalupettanu. Akkada Sudheer parichayam ayyadu, naa kanna 3 years pedda but manchi friends ayyamu.
Friends lekapovadam valla naku ekkadi kanna okkadine velladam alavatu movies ki ayyina,resturant ki ayyina, beach ki anna okkadine velthu unde vadni. Alane oka roju jagadamba lo Jack Reacher mve ki vellanu, weekday and noon show valla asalu very few people unnaru theatre lo. Naa karma kaali oka uncle naa pakka kurchunnaru, kurchunnodu tinnakaa undaka nannu molest chesadu. Naku aa time ki asalu zero sexual knowledge and inka ila magallu magallu cheskovadaalu avvi em teliyadu, bhayam tho freeze ayyiypoyanu, aayana idedho green signal anattu nannu aagam aagam chesadu.
Interval lo theatre nundi paripoyanu, naku idhi evaritho share cheskovalo ardam kaledu. Chala rojulu nalo nenu chala struggle ayyanu. Finally my only friend at that time Sudheer daggara open ayyanu (my worst decision in my life) thanu nannu valla intiki rammani cheppi ila muttukunnada ala pattukunnada ani chepandu. Sudheer inka nannu ekkadekkado touch cheyyadam start chesadu, aaputunte aa vishayam andariki cheppestha ani nannu blackmail chesevadu.
Modatlo just touch chesevadu mellaga nannu thanani hug cheskomani, sexual acts cheyyamani force chesevadu and no cheppina vinne vadu kadu. Edustunna odilevadu kadu, natho forceful ga sex chesevadu, ala naku teliyakundane thana blackmail valla chala dhooram vellipoyanu. Valla sister clothes nannu veskomani natho regular ga sex chesevadu. For 4 years nenu alane narakam chusanu thana valla.
Finally valla father transfer tho thana nundi naku freedom vachindi (ani anukunnanu) all the things he had done to me had an effect on me mentally. Naku abbayila medha elanti feelings levu and vachevi kadu. Kani naku ammayila battalu vesukovaali ani and thanu natho sex chesinatti evaranna cheste bagundu anna feelings naalo start ayyayi. Internet and porn aaa feelilngs ni inka balaparichayi.
Nenu btech second year lo undaga naa female classmate tho chala close ayyanu, thanaki nenu nachanu and she proposed to me and I accepted. From that day memu relation lo unnamu and ee feelings sangathi nenu marchipoyanu mellaga. Konni rojulaki memu physical avudam ani plan chesukoni maa intlo naa birthday roju meet iyyam maa family leni time lo. Foreplay jarugutu jaruguthu we were both in inners and then all those feelings were back.
Naku thana inners touch cheyyagane evo teliyani feelings and all those years of memories rushed back in my mind. I just broke down crying in front of her. Thanaki em ardam katledu nenu enduku ala edustunna ani nannu console cheyyadaniki chala try chesindi but nenu problem enti ani thana daggara open avvalekapoyanu and I asked her to leave.
Oka 1 week nenu clg ki poledu, thana phones ki respond avvaledu thanu emo thanu emanna tappu chesindi emo ani chala guilty ga feel avuthu message chesedi naku thanaki ela cheppalo ardam kaledu, finally I am not ready for this ani edho sodhi reasons cheppi aa topic divert chesanu. Naku thanu ante chaala istam but everytime when things escalated to sex, my past rushed in.
Pratisaari just oral ga thanani satisfy chestu elagola manage chesanu college times lo and jobs kosam memu verai verai states lo unde appudu. Slowly she saw it for what it is and thanu straight ga nannu adigesindi whats wrong ani and appatiki naku dhairyam lekapoyina idhi vishayam ani cheppadaniki ela enni rojulu manage chestam ani mottam open ayyipoyanu. Thanu mottam vinnaka em analedu nenu inka akkadnundi vachesa.
Oka 4-5 days em matladaledu, nenu thanaki space iddam ani message kaani calls kani cheyyaledu. Finally on the 6th day thanu message chesindi idhi workout avvadu, lets break up ani. I was completely shattered from inside. Complete ga depression loki vellipoyanu, on top of this maa parents pelli pelli ani dobbadam start chesaru so Canada ki studies kosam ani vachesanu 2 years avvutundi.
Malla maa parents gola start chesaru you are 32 pelli cheskovali nuvvu ani pressure chestunnaru. Vallaki ela cheppanu enni years love chesina ammayi nannu vadilesindi inka vere ammayi ki ela ardamavutundi. I dont know what to do now, naa life elagu nasanam ayyipoyindi ippudu pelli chesukoni aaa ammayi life kuda spoil cheyyala?
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